Gotta get through this...

Come on...let me get to 275 please.....277.8 today. I needed that boost this morning. Almost a month now of this and if I didn't show any signs soon, I would've been UNHAPPY.

Nevertheless, some improvement.

Last night was fun. 7 games of racquetball (about 1hr 45min) and then a mile at the track (Peter/Adam did more). Then we hung out at Trojan Grounds just telling funny stories and reminiscing about good foods we want to eat but shouldn't! Feelin the annoying stress of school right now...gotta get through this.

WOOT PART DEUX!!!

adrenaline's still going into tonight's 2 hour racquetball foray.

- 279.3lbs today! Not really a big improvement since I've been here before (once during this diet, 4 or 5 times in life), but i take it more for it's significance - frankly i'm tired of seeing the first two numbers be 2-8.

- ate a 12-in italian sausage sandwich w/caramelized onions, mushrooms, bell peppers, on oats and seeds bread from malibu subs. and kettle chips. i could've picked a healthier choice. wouldn't be surprised if i go back up over that dreaded 2-8-0 mark.

- feelin pretty sore today though. i really pushed it yesterday by upping the weight on everything. oh well, it's a good kind of sore =0)

WOOT!!!

Feelin good!

- did the 500 crunches that I wanted to
- showed improvement in all of the weights I was lifting
- 45s on the bench
- 100 on lats, butterfly
- 25 on bis, tris
- did about 2 miles walking
- ate a chicken caesar salad with a turkey sandwich today (wanted to eat breakfast, no time)

and, to make it better, feelin more organized, and got some adrenaline right now.

to give you something to do when you're not reading this blog, check out WOOT

there's a woot off right now, gotta love it!

Is it possible?

Well, this is going to be another Gary-downer post. While in the shower I've realized that for the past month, nothing's changed. I'm no closer to my weight goal, the CD has not progressed any further, and I'm just more tired than usual. How can it be possible that I've wasted an entire month?

Yes, I do feel better in shape, but I still weigh the same. My body is still the same.

The diet is going to be running full steam ahead tomorrow, but I'm feeling like that's all I am, full of steam.

I'm going to keep trying things until they work. Whatever it is, I'm going to keep trying.

• I heard once that Usher (haven't heard of him in awhile) did 1000 sit-ups/crunches a day. 1000! I feel like that would take me two weeks to do a 1000.
• I heard that holding in your stomach and holding for a little bit, is the same thing as a sit-up.
• I'm combining the two. I'm going to see if I can do (I'm setting the goal a lot lower b/c I'm not Usher) 500 sit-ups/crunches/holding in my tummy for one day. If I can do it one day, I'm certainly going to keep going. I'm always interested in a challenge. This one might, again, be too lofty. Oh well, I'll let you know how it goes.

-edit-

Crunch Count
9:00am - woke up
10:00am - 300 crunches
2:40pm - 500 crunches total
(these pseudo-crunches I'm doing aren't as strenuous as regular crunches, but I'm starting to feel it).

not hungry

After racquectball today (which i thought the frist game went well, but everything else was jsut ok) i went to Jamba Juice and got a medium sized Light drink. I dunno how many calories or what but light is better than a reg. one. For lunch at 3:20 I had a full turkey sandwich from wolfgang and a liter of water. before class i refilled my bottle and drank most of it during class. today i haven't been really hungry throughout the day but we still have a couple hours to go. i think tonight i will try to eat a "light" dinner. have fun tonight guys :)

Tired

Blah. Today's the first time I've fallen asleep in class this school year. By the time Thursdays come around it's difficult because we've already worked out 3 days, plus we've got Wednesday night cardio/weight lifting, and a couple hours later we've got racquetball. Anyway, my diet started today.

• had a turkey sandwich, small caesar salad
• hopefully something healthy and small =0)

It's funny b/c I was talking w/Adam about how I would leave my house feeling slimmer, but see myself as the same size (biggie) later on during the day. He said it's b/c we're taller in the morning b/c we stretch out when we sleep, and during the day gravity weighs us down. Hmm!

Weekend's almost here, thank goodness. Finally gonna have some more time to work on the CD.

Ends

It's been awhile b/c I was gone on a retreat this weekend. While it was refreshing to get away from the stress and struggles of everything at USC, I still find I'm battling with my weight.

I'm finding different meanings in the phrase "question yourself". I usually question myself in what I see as a constructive manner, critically for the sake of improvement. Lately, I've been second-guessing myself, unsure of how I'm acting in some superficial situations.
My self-consciousness has reached new highs.

I'm at the ends of this. It's time to move to another stage. I'm too impatient to wait for results of having worked out everyday (three weeks in now).

Starting tomorrow:

• smaller portions, different foods, a more food-conscious self
  


• more efficiency, better organization, a more productive lifestyle
  


• pushing the limits of creativity, accumulating knowledge, a well-read, unique perspective
  

A golden day. I need a brand new start. (ironically from the song Start)