An Integrated Life

As I've reached the 10th day of the new workout regimen, I've discovered two things:

1. It is difficult to not complain. I'm constantly talking about how tired/sore I am to my two partners, and they're polite enough to tolerate it. I want to move past the whining and just do it. It probably furthers my exhaustion too when I claim that I'm tired (b/c I'm used to being that) when I'm not necessarily.


• The irony - I'm complaining about how much I complain.


2. It is difficult to not let this consume my life. Other than trying to find a post-graduation job, all I think about is the exercise. I tell practically everyone I see about the new workout plan. That's stupid because I'm not doing it for them, so I'm not interested in having expectations drawn for me.
   
   • Nevertheless, it is a big deal for me because I've never worked out consistently like this. It's something I'm really excited about. But when this workout routine becomes normal, then I will have a better grasp on things.

What's frightening to me is this blanket of apathy I'm surrounding myself with. I've considered apathy to be a huge problem. I don't understand how you could just not care about something. Maybe it's not apathy, it's a mix of boredom and numbness.

Weight

• I'm 281 on the dot today.
  

Tuesday

• Food - I ate a herb sausage calzone with a side caesar salad and macaroni and cheese. I had a margarita later at the Justin concert (<---amazing).


• Exercise - I played an hour and a half of racquetball.

Wednesday

• Food - I ate a calzone (sausage, hash brown, eggs, tomatoes, cheese) and an express meal (two sausages, two eggs, 2 pieces of wheat toast, hashbrowns) all for breakfast. For dinner, I ate my fried rice again.


• Exercise - 10 minutes of stairmaster (worst machine created ever. I wanted to die even though I only did 10 minutes), 15 minutes of bike.

Thursday

• Food - I ate a spam/egg sandwich this morning. Yum! I might eat the same thing tonight!
  
• Exercise - hour and a half of racquetball this morning. Really fun except I got hit the hardest I've ever been hit in the head. Played ok though. Scores were something like: (A-P-G) 15-7-2, 15-10-7, 15-12-9 (we were stuck at 0-0-0, 2-2-2, 4-4-4 on the last game).